this poor girl! she is so torn between different worlds and does not know where to go or what to do! One the one hand, she longed to get away from the place she resented the most, but she seems to just go to a place she feels the same toward...
as I read, I got the feeling that she was homesick, obviously...and she completely resents it...her stubborn character and personality make her think of returning to, or having a connection with a past was a sign of weakness...for her, this isn't just a personal thing; she thinks everyone should disconnect from their past as they move into the future...this is demonstrated on pages 33-34, "...I thought Mariah should have long separated the person Gus standing in front of her in the present from all things he had meant to her in the past"...I don't think she has come to realize yet that your previous experience make you who you are in the present...this may be the reason why she resents her mother so much now, but cannot explain why....
another thing I am confused about was the last two pages of the assigned reading...her unwillingness to even hug Mariah after opening up to her is a prime example of her feelings toward her own culture and the culture she is trying to fit into...I don't think she really means to be so mean to Mariah, but I feel so bad for her either way...as she tries to seperate herself from what she is used to, she is blocking possible connections to others...
j
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